DOH! Feeling stupid...
For those of you that saw my navigate to destination via stellar routes (i.e. around Venus or Mars first) - I think I figured it out. PICNIC. It's still IMHO a poor 'feature' designed in the software, but read on for an explanation.
It appears that regardless of what options you select (avoid tolls, avoid ferries) - the new navigation will plan the first route - guess what - AVOIDING TOLLS. I say the first route, because once you select a destination - it doesn't really start navigation yet. Instead it takes you to the next screen where it calculates and displays the FIRST route it's going to come up with (yea - the one where it avoids tolls even though I did not select that in my choices). Before you tell it to really, really, really go - if you wait a minute, an alternate route comes up! After the display of the first route, it starts calculating another. Since we were not given that choice with the old software, I had never waited for another route to be prepared - we'd simply choose - yes go there you numnuts - that's what we asked for!
Today after playing, I realize that before the final "commit" selection (i.e. start navigation), after another more several seconds, an alternate route comes up. Guess what - it's the shorter faster route - GEE WHIZ - ON TOLL ROADS. Note - in every instance we've seen so far, this secondary option is shorter and faster - but does it calculate both options first before giving you a choice? No - it does a calculation avoiding tolls, displays it - then goes on calculating others. So... the numskulls programmed the device to calculate a route biased on an option I didn't choose (avoid tolls). Then, secondarily, it decides to look at a toll option (that is shorter, faster, and most desired).
It's still too stupid to dump us off the Florida Turnpike at the exit next to my neighborhood (it takes us a few miles south or north then runs surface roads roundy roundy - really stupid) - but I have my workaround for that. I simply add a waypoint I have in memory that is the exit across my neighborhood and it seems to do well. A little extra work, but not that bad.
Now that I know this software 'feature' - my wife and I are a bit happier.